Wish #1: Ten more wishes

I exercised due diligence to see if there was an official rule against using a pre-granted wish for more wishes and found none. I’ve made my decision to go for it.

Here’s my reasoning, because I’m almost blown out of my chair by the force of so many readers hollering at their screens, “You’re not allowed to wish for more wishes!”

I know, I know. I think the same thought. I’ve seen the same movies and read the same books as you. It does seem as if there is a rule or, at least, a group-think understanding against it.

But is there an actual rule that says ‘No’?

Faeries, as I understand them, feel a hardy distaste for greed. I’m not  big fan of it myself. So I wanted to be extremely careful and respectful in my demeanor toward this gift. If multiple wishes aren’t allowed, I ain’t gonna ask for ’em.

That’s why I bothered to do some research. One doesn’t receive a genuine offer to make a wish by a Faery Godmother without giving that wish serious thought.

I tried to find out if this rule has been officially put down in writing somewhere, aside from fiction and fairy tales. But where on Earth (or beyond) would that be?

Because I can’t pose ‘yes’ or ‘no’ queries to the Oracle who first granted this wish, I couldn’t just ask, “Is this allowed?” I had to find that answer another way.

So, I mentally asked the Faery Godmother to answer my question in another way: show me a sign. I even surfed the internet as an active participant in the search — I’m not just lazily asking to be proven wrong.

I saw nothing. I found nothing.

While waiting for my sign, I spent a few days trying to figure out what I would wish for, in case it turned out that I was only allowed the one.

I also spent that time becoming aware of how often, in everyday life, I would mindlessly begin sentences with the words “I wish …”.

I meant nothing by the phrase. It was just a dramatic way to begin a stream of words pouring through my noggin.

I had to catch myself numerous times. For example, while ridiculously blocked in a grocery store aisle, I caught myself about to mutter, “I wish these people would get out of my way!”.

If I wasn’t more careful, I realized, this could have been granted as my Big Wish, and I would have wasted it on something boring, petulant and completely inconsequential.

I couldn’t believe how often I thought things like that! It was almost constant, as if — because I didn’t normally believe that wishes can come true — there’s no harm in wishing for whatever I wanted, including the vaporizing of random Trader Joe’s shoppers, who were blocking my access to the goat cheese.

Catching myself yammering these childish complaints was like tap-dancing through a landmine, becoming — by necessity — ever more mindful to tiptoe carefully through my unconscious thoughts while I pondered what my one wish would be.

On one such occasion, I was pissing and moaning about not being able to find a parking spot in front of my house, and expressing angry words about what I’d like to see happen to neighbors who got there before me.

With my eyes opened, at long last, I stopped bitching and said, aloud, to the ever-listening Faery Godmother, “I didn’t mean that! That wasn’t my wish!”

Finally — since any careless complaining could be misunderstood as The Wish — I said to her, “When I make my actual wish, it will be out loud and deliberate, okay? Please don’t grant anything that is not in a complete sentence, and spoken aloud, to you.”

And now, because I had asked to be shown if there was a definitive rule against wishing for more wishes and was shown nothing, I’m taking that as my sign.

I feel like the window for wishing that wish is beginning to close. When I look at the picture of the Oracle telling me, “Make a wish”, the magical energy that I originally felt isn’t as strong. It’s beginning to fade, and I’m hearing her gentle instruction: “Say your right words.”

So, I’m going to go ahead and do it.

Wish #1:

I wish for ten more wishes, please.

Thank you.

And, of course, here’s you a dog, dressed as a genie.


lisa author shotLisa Bonnice is an award-winning, best-selling author. Her current passion-project is a series of metaphysical comedy novels. The first in the series is Be Careful What You Witch For!, a modern-day fairy tale about Lola Garnett, a bored housewife and office drone who wakes up with unexpected psychic abilities, and no instruction manual, and Twink, the reluctant, sarcastic faery assigned to assist and educate her. Its sequel, Patterns in the Chaos, is in the works.

http://www.lisabonnice.com

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