How I got over myself and learned to love River Song

River Song is coming back to Doctor Who for the Christmas special this month and I’m over-the-moon ecstatic to see her again! I’ll admit, however, that I hated her when she first showed up in the Library and claimed to be married to the Tenth Doctor.

Nuh uh. If anyone’s gonna marry the Doctor (especially David Tennant), it’s gonna be me! (Yes, I’m in my fifties, but I can still squee like a fangirl).

river i hate you

So, yeah, it took me a while to warm up to her. I think the first time I felt a glimmer of respect was when she marched down the corridor of a space ship in those incredible shoes, the kind in which I’d surely break an ankle.

river shoes

Even so, I still resented her. I mean, she was not a standard beauty. She was older and didn’t fit into the normal mold of leading ladies. And she was kind of pushy. Who did she think she was?

And that’s when I had my “Aha!” moment.

I hated her because she represented everything that the patriarchal aspects of society had trained me to loathe about myself, as a woman. And here she was, spitting in the face of convention!

Think about it. River Song was the ultimate bad ass witch. She was:

river regen

  • Insanely sure of herself
  • Full bodied and rippling with power
  • Beyond intelligent—as clever as the Doctor
  • Fiercely loving and compassionate
  • Courageous
  • Oozing with sexuality
  • The Doctor’s equal

So why on earth did I hate her? Because she reminded me of everything that I could have been but chose, out of fear, not to be.

Now, why do I love her? Because she reminds me that it’s never too late to choose again.

river kiss


lisa author shotLisa Bonnice is an award-winning, best-selling author and editor/manuscript doctor (and former stand-up comedienne—is there anything she can’t do???). Her current passion-project is a series of metaphysical comedy novels. The first in the series is Be Careful What You Witch For!, a modern-day fairy tale about Lola Garnett, a bored housewife, mom and office drone who wakes up with unexpected psychic abilities, and no instruction manual, and Twink, the reluctant, sarcastic faery assigned to assist and educate her.

Here’s you a blog, about my blog, “Here’s you a blog”.

wheres me a dog
Imagine my surprise when I saw this blog about my blog!

WordPress notified me about a huge jump in my blog stats today–it seems one of them has gone viral. Well, germy anyway. My stats are usually pretty decent, considering I mostly write goofy stuff for myself and don’t promote my blog much. I have a small, undefinable niche following. So I was surprised to see a huge uptick.

Someone at Atlas Obscura wrote a blog about the title I’ve given my blogsite, Here’s You a Blog. That blog is titled: Where’s Me a Dog? Here’s You a Dog: The South’s Most Unusual Regionalism. The writer, Sarah Laskow, writes fun and quirky articles (click on her name to see a list, but make sure you have some time, because it’s a treasure trove of great stuff!).

Sarah’s blog about my blog tells how Larry Horn, one of the founders of the Yale Grammatical Diversity Project discovered the “here’s you a…” phenomenon because I wrote about it. Her blog says:

This discovery began with a blog titled “Here’s you a blog,” which Larry Horn, one of the project’s founders, had come across. This blogger had first come across this grammatical quirk–”here’s you a…”–while traveling in Kentucky: a post office clerk had handed over a stamp featuring a dog, and said, “Here’s you a dog.” The phrase delighted the blogger, and she started using it to label pictures of dogs, until she realized she could apply it to other nouns–like her blog.

How fun is that? Sarah writes about some fascinating stuff, and now I’m one of them! I can’t help feeling, though, like I’m in a house of mirrors. Here’s you a blog, about a blog, about my blog, “Here’s you a blog!”

fierce dog

Oh yeah. Here’s you a ferocious dog who tries desperately to lunge through that fence and tear me into tiny shreds, every time I pass by on my morning walk. It doesn’t help that I say things like “Oh, wook at da kyoot widdo doggie!” That only pisses it off more.

Book review: Developing Psychic Abilities by Apryl J. Douglas

Developing Psychic Abilities

Full Disclosure: I know Apryl. I used to work for her at Vision Quest Metaphysical Bookstore, in Phoenix, Arizona. So, my review may be slightly biased but, honestly, if I didn’t believe that this book is worth recommending, I wouldn’t have written the review (in the vein of “If you can’t say something nice…”).

Apryl DouglasThe title, Developing Psychic Abilities, downplays the strengths of this book. Yes, there are plenty of suggestions as to how to develop your abilities, if you’re new to the game. But Apryl also includes a lot of tips and tricks that go far beyond the basics.

This book teaches about astral projection, using a pendulum, candle magic, aura cleansing, automatic writing, psychic protection and much more.

Her book is written in plain language–that is, it’s not full of complex explanations or woo-woo jargon. She also includes a section in the back where you can write notes with your results. Yes, I recommend this book!

Apryl, herself, has been aware of her psychic abilities most of her life–they surfaced when she was 13. She has owned Vision Quest since 1986. Back then, she was in the Los Angeles area and her store was one of the best. I used to shop there, when I lived in LA, but she and I never met at the time. Small world, that I should end up working for her, once her store and I both moved to Phoenix.

She is available for psychic readings, by phone or at her store, most Saturdays. You can call 480-949-1888 to schedule a reading. If Saturdays don’t work for you, her store staffs several other very talented readers and healers, seven days a week. Check out the store’s website for reader bios and schedules.

Lisa Bonnice is the best-selling, award-winning author of five books, including Shape Shifting–reclaiming YOUR perfect body, the True Crime Bestseller Fear of Our Father (with Stacey M. Kananen)  and the metaphysical-comedy novel, Be Careful What You Witch For!

Best seller—Fear of Our Father—#1 True Crime
eLit Silver Award—The Menhattan Project—Humor
Includes foreword by Neale Donald Walsch—Shape Shifting
Two Excellence Awards—

A friend is on Fox and Friends!

Peter and Alejandra

How fun! I just found out from Victoria Flores–my co-author on The Menhattan Project–that her husband, Peter Argue, is going to be on Fox and Friends this Sunday at 8:30am for a fun Fathers Day special on conquering the “Dad Bod”, with their adorable baby daughter. Check it out!

If you’re interested, I wrote a blog about Peter when the book first came out (he’s a professional model and one of the main characters was loosely based on him):

FOLLOW UP: Here is the link to Peter’s appearance on Fox and Friends. Peter is the one on the far left.

You know you’re old when …

Lola Garnett, from Be Careful What You Witch For! shares words of wisdom.

Lola Garnett, from Be Careful What You Witch For!, shares words of wisdom.

Martha McGrath, 1851, Bradford England

Kiss me! I’m 1/8th Irish!

Here's you a blog ...

I think Martha McGrath was my mom’s mom’s dad’s dad’s mom (my third great-grandmother). I say “I think” because I’m not 100% sure. All signs point in that direction, but I hesitate to state it as fact. One of her sons shows up in a stranger’s family tree with matching information to my own, so it’s safe to assume they are the same person, but I’m always cautious if I can’t confirm it more than once.

According to the 1851 England census,  Martha lived in Bradford, England (Bradford was mentioned in the Doctor Who episode The Crimson Horror) with her three children at 120 Longland St. I can actually see that building on Google Maps. When Jeff and I go to England this summer, I’ll see it in person.

Born in 1807, Martha was a 44-year-old widow at the time and worked as a dress maker. She was…

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Astrology Experiment: looking for others who share my birthday

I find astrology fascinating. I’m not an expert and probably never will be, but I do love the information I receive from my chart. I’ve often wondered if people who are born at the same time end up living similar lives. So …

If you were born on November 30, 1960, with Virgo rising, let me know. I’d love to compare stories with you. If you don’t want to post your story in the comments below, drop me an email at

I look forward to hearing from you!

Lisa Bonnice is the author of five books, including Shape Shifting–reclaiming YOUR perfect body (with a foreword by Neale Donald Walsch), the True Crime Bestseller Fear of Our Father (with Stacey M. Kananen)  and the comedy novel, Be Careful What You Witch For!