The etiquette of a properly worded wish

Etiquette gone wrong — Image Source

Who knew the etiquette of requesting wishes, pre-granted by a Faery Godmother, would be so complicated?! I’ve already wrestled with the questions ‘Is wishing for more wishes allowed?’ and ‘Must a wish be kept secret?’. Now I’m faced with another: “What is the proper way to word a wish?”

I’ve seen my fair share of movies and books about fairy tales and fantasies, of all sorts. I’ve witnessed lots of fictional wish-making, and there is always a downward plot twist if the wish isn’t worded properly.

I’ve also been a New Ager (for lack of a better term) for decades, so I’ve had lots of experience with the confusing rules of  affirmations, the Law of Attraction, and “positive thinking”.

For example: focus on what you want instead of what you don’t want (without using the word “want”); state your affirmations in the present tense, even if they feel false; if you don’t get what you asked for, you’re doing it wrong.

This can all be summed up by the following statement: karma is a bitch.

I’ve had my ass kicked aplenty by karma, so I’m going to be really careful with how I approach her.

My research shows conflicting reports, so I’m going to put together a mashup of the rules that make the most sense to me, and hope I don’t get any karmic blow-back.

Basically, it boils down to common sense: be careful what you wish for.

On a related note, we’re told to set a deadline or the Universe doesn’t know when we need it by. I have to wonder, though. Is the Universe that dense? Doesn’t it know, by the vibe of the scenario, when relief is needed? And, if I’m making a wish, doesn’t that imply the need is now?

The standard response is, “Trust in divine timing. You’ll get what you need, not what you want,” to which I reply, “Then what is the point of wishes?”

After spending so much time on making sure I have my wish perfectly polished before I ‘say my right words’, I find myself asking, “Am I over-analyzing?”

Am I beating this into the ground, or is all of this second guessing helpful because it forces me to focus on what I really want? Abraham says to hold a thought for 17 seconds and the Law of Attraction kicks in. Well, I have certainly done at least that.

Image Source

The Oracle did say “Think about what you ask for”. Perhaps this is what it meant. Perhaps it’s telling me to give it some deep, deep thought so I not only word the wish correctly, I also start its manifestation rolling.

Here’s my first wish of 10, after a great deal of thought about the wording, according to the rules that makes sense for quality wish-making (as I mentioned in a previous blog, I’m going to keep my wish secret for the time being, so I’ll be obscuring any spoilers):

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Wish #1 of 10

I wish for SPOILERSPOILERSPOILER, free and clear, no harm/no foul, to be delivered by the end of July 2017, in a joyful and generous way that harms none and helps all.

Thank you.

Here’s you a well-mannered dog.

 

 

 

If a wish is revealed, is it null and void?

Another wishing-protocol question has come up, this time about keeping your wish a secret. We’ve all heard that you’re not supposed to tell anyone what you wish for — when blowing out birthday candles or wishing on a shooting star — because then it won’t come true. But, is this up for debate?

According to this site, when wishing on a star, you’re not supposed to tell anyone. On the other hand, this site doesn’t say a word about secrecy, so we can assume that they don’t believe keeping your wish to yourself is a big deal.

If it’s true that you’re not supposed to tell, then I’ve already blown it because I told that my first wish is for ten more wishes.

However, I never felt any intuitive nudges that my Faery Godmother minded either that I was talking about this, or that I told my first wish. And, believe me, I know from experience that if there’s something I’m not supposed to be doing — especially after I make a point of asking for guidance — I will be prevented from making that mistake, either because my computer will continually crash — keeping me from blogging — or I will be distracted in some other equally laborious way.

Now that it’s time to start wishing, in earnest, I’m feeling some trepidation about sharing what those wishes might be.

The problem I’m facing is that I’m not sure if it’s early-years birthday-cake training, or if my intuitive guidance is telling me to tick a lock.

There’s another angle to this, which has nothing to do with the rules of wish-making. Part of me is afraid to reveal what my first of the ten wishes is, just in case it doesn’t come true.

Maybe I was okay with sharing Wish #1 because there was no way to prove whether it was granted or not.

There, I said it. What if, after all this talk about being granted a wish by a Faery Godmother, and all the folderol over whether I’m allowed to ask for more wishes … what if my first provable wish doesn’t come true? I’m gonna look rather foolish, you know?

I asked the Oracle about this, and here’s the response I received:

This could be interpreted a couple of different ways:

  1. Because I’ve already more or less decided what Wish #2 will be, this card could be telling me to give it more thought before speaking it aloud to my Faery Godmother. Perhaps it could be tweaked a little further.
  2. Or, it could be advising me to not tell what my wish is, to only “think” about it.

It could be both, or neither. However, both of the above feel true, so that’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to keep the details of Wish #2 to myself, for now.

I’ll reveal my wish if … (that’s not very good Law of Attraction wording, is it?) … I’ll reveal it when it comes true.

You’ll just have to take my word for it that what I end up with is what I wished for. I’d rather keep everyone else in the dark and risk being annoying, than to risk not getting my wish because I felt unspoken peer pressure to spill my guts.

I’ll keep you posted. Meantime, here’s you a dog with a secret.

P.S. Before I posted this blog, live, I just happened to be directed to see this on Facebook. Tell me that’s not a sign!


Lisa Bonnice is an award-winning, best-selling author. Her current passion-project is a series of metaphysical comedy novels. The first in the series is Be Careful What You Witch For!, a modern-day fairy tale about Lola Garnett, a bored housewife and office drone who wakes up with unexpected psychic abilities, and no instruction manual, and Twink, the reluctant, sarcastic faery assigned to assist and educate her. Its sequel, Patterns in the Chaos, is in the works.

http://www.lisabonnice.com

Wish #1: Ten more wishes

I exercised due diligence to see if there was an official rule against using a pre-granted wish for more wishes and found none. I’ve made my decision to go for it.

Here’s my reasoning, because I’m almost blown out of my chair by the force of so many readers hollering at their screens, “You’re not allowed to wish for more wishes!”

I know, I know. I think the same thought. I’ve seen the same movies and read the same books as you. It does seem as if there is a rule or, at least, a group-think understanding against it.

But is there an actual rule that says ‘No’?

Faeries, as I understand them, feel a hardy distaste for greed. I’m not  big fan of it myself. So I wanted to be extremely careful and respectful in my demeanor toward this gift. If multiple wishes aren’t allowed, I ain’t gonna ask for ’em.

That’s why I bothered to do some research. One doesn’t receive a genuine offer to make a wish by a Faery Godmother without giving that wish serious thought.

I tried to find out if this rule has been officially put down in writing somewhere, aside from fiction and fairy tales. But where on Earth (or beyond) would that be?

Because I can’t pose ‘yes’ or ‘no’ queries to the Oracle who first granted this wish, I couldn’t just ask, “Is this allowed?” I had to find that answer another way.

So, I mentally asked the Faery Godmother to answer my question in another way: show me a sign. I even surfed the internet as an active participant in the search — I’m not just lazily asking to be proven wrong.

I saw nothing. I found nothing.

While waiting for my sign, I spent a few days trying to figure out what I would wish for, in case it turned out that I was only allowed the one.

I also spent that time becoming aware of how often, in everyday life, I would mindlessly begin sentences with the words “I wish …”.

I meant nothing by the phrase. It was just a dramatic way to begin a stream of words pouring through my noggin.

I had to catch myself numerous times. For example, while ridiculously blocked in a grocery store aisle, I caught myself about to mutter, “I wish these people would get out of my way!”.

If I wasn’t more careful, I realized, this could have been granted as my Big Wish, and I would have wasted it on something boring, petulant and completely inconsequential.

I couldn’t believe how often I thought things like that! It was almost constant, as if — because I didn’t normally believe that wishes can come true — there’s no harm in wishing for whatever I wanted, including the vaporizing of random Trader Joe’s shoppers, who were blocking my access to the goat cheese.

Catching myself yammering these childish complaints was like tap-dancing through a landmine, becoming — by necessity — ever more mindful to tiptoe carefully through my unconscious thoughts while I pondered what my one wish would be.

On one such occasion, I was pissing and moaning about not being able to find a parking spot in front of my house, and expressing angry words about what I’d like to see happen to neighbors who got there before me.

With my eyes opened, at long last, I stopped bitching and said, aloud, to the ever-listening Faery Godmother, “I didn’t mean that! That wasn’t my wish!”

Finally — since any careless complaining could be misunderstood as The Wish — I said to her, “When I make my actual wish, it will be out loud and deliberate, okay? Please don’t grant anything that is not in a complete sentence, and spoken aloud, to you.”

And now, because I had asked to be shown if there was a definitive rule against wishing for more wishes and was shown nothing, I’m taking that as my sign.

I feel like the window for wishing that wish is beginning to close. When I look at the picture of the Oracle telling me, “Make a wish”, the magical energy that I originally felt isn’t as strong. It’s beginning to fade, and I’m hearing her gentle instruction: “Say your right words.”

So, I’m going to go ahead and do it.

Wish #1:

I wish for ten more wishes, please.

Thank you.

And, of course, here’s you a dog, dressed as a genie.


lisa author shotLisa Bonnice is an award-winning, best-selling author. Her current passion-project is a series of metaphysical comedy novels. The first in the series is Be Careful What You Witch For!, a modern-day fairy tale about Lola Garnett, a bored housewife and office drone who wakes up with unexpected psychic abilities, and no instruction manual, and Twink, the reluctant, sarcastic faery assigned to assist and educate her. Its sequel, Patterns in the Chaos, is in the works.

http://www.lisabonnice.com

What should I wish for?

If you read my most recent blog, you know that I have been granted a wish by my Faery Godmother. You also know that my first order of business is to determine whether or not I am allowed to wish for more wishes.

It’s the first thing many of us would ask for, if given the chance, but is it allowed? A Facebook poll of my friends shows that many believe that it’s not. But has anyone ever seen an official rule-book that says we can’t, or is the fabled limit just poetic license to make fairy tales more interesting?

The answer to these questions determine my future, so I’m not using my wish just yet. I don’t want to squander a unique opportunity. While I search for a definitive answer, those questions invite more to come forth, like:

  1. If I can wish for more, how many should I ask for? Unlimited wishes might be a bit much. Not only would it feel greedy, unlimited wishes might dilute the adventure of life on planet Earth.
  2. Would 10 be enough? I think it would because — if carefully worded — the first three ought to be enough to set me up for life, especially at my age. I only have a few decades left (I don’t think I’d wish to be immortal, but that’s a topic for another blog). The extra seven could be used as gifts or in case of emergency.
  3. If I am allowed 10 wishes, what would they be — especially those first three?
  4. If I can’t wish for more, what will my one wish be?
  5. Is it true that one should use a single wish for someone else, that the most blessed course of action is to give away something so priceless?

So, you see, there’s a lot to think about while I search for the answer to the primary question: am I allowed to wish for more wishes?

Meantime, here’s you a Fairy God Dog:


lisa author shotLisa Bonnice is an award-winning, best-selling author. Her current passion-project is a series of metaphysical comedy novels. The first in the series is Be Careful What You Witch For!, a modern-day fairy tale about Lola Garnett, a bored housewife and office drone who wakes up with unexpected psychic abilities, and no instruction manual, and Twink, the reluctant, sarcastic faery assigned to assist and educate her. Its sequel, Patterns in the Chaos, is in the works.

http://www.lisabonnice.com

If offered one wish, can we wish for more?

 

I have an oracle app on my phone called Faces of Faerie, by Brian Froud, the designer of movies like The Dark Crystal and Labyrinth. The oracle told me “Make a wish” and this got me thinking:

What if I really had been granted a wish?

At first I considered the old standard “I wish for all the money I’ll ever need”, but I decided to take this seriously, just for fun. I’ve seen the movie Bedazzled (a comedy about a man named Elliot Richards who sells his soul for seven wishes) and even wrote a comedy novel called Be Careful What You Witch For! about a woman who wishes for a more interesting life and gets it.    

Mayhem can happen if you mess around with something like this. “Fools rush in,” they say.

Then I thought, “What if I wish for more wishes?”

A flood of stories filled my head about characters who have been granted a wish and were told that’s not allowed.

But is that true?

Is there really a rule somewhere that says you can’t wish for more wishes? If so, says who? And, are they the boss of me?

I’ve been granted a wish and I want to spend it wisely. I don’t want to end up like Elliot Richards who asks to be the most sensitive man in the world and gets what he wishes for!

Given the opportunity, what would you wish for?

By the way, here’s you some disruptive dogs!


lisa author shotLisa Bonnice is an award-winning, best-selling author. Her current passion-project is a series of metaphysical comedy novels. The first in the series is Be Careful What You Witch For!, a modern-day fairy tale about Lola Garnett, a bored housewife and office drone who wakes up with unexpected psychic abilities, and no instruction manual, and Twink, the reluctant, sarcastic faery assigned to assist and educate her. Its sequel, Patterns in the Chaos, is in the works.

http://www.lisabonnice.com

The voyage to meet my ancestors begins …

On November 8, 1921, my great-grandfather William Garroch—along with his brother Peter, his 16-year-old son (my grandfather, William Jr.) and his nephew Thomas—crossed the Atlantic Ocean, from Glasgow to New York City. They traveled on an ocean liner called Cameronia, in second-class cabins.

On January 20, 1922, my great-grandmother Helen—along with their three daughters—followed on a ship called Lapland, also second-class. Helen had $200 cash, in pocket.

After passing through Ellis Island, they traveled by train to Castle Gate, Utah, where Helen’s brother, William Littlejohn, was the superintendent of the Castle Gate coal mine, owned by the Utah Fuel Company. He had arranged jobs for numerous family members, and many of them traveled from Scotland, where the life of a coal miner was much, much more difficult.

Both oceanic voyages took 11 days, and I don’t know how long it took them to get from NYC to Castle Gate. Tomorrow I will travel to Castle Gate with my daughter, from Phoenix, Arizona, a nine-hour drive.

I’ll keep their discomfort in mind if I begin to feel restless about sitting in a car for such a ‘long time’. My daughter’s car is a comfy ride, and we’ll have a cooler packed full of fresh, healthy Trader Joe foods. In comparison, I have nothing to complain about.

Once we’re there, we’ll be touring the site where the town of Castle Gate used to be. It no longer exists. The only thing left is the cemetery where William, Helen, Peter and Thomas are buried, and the opening to Mine #2, the mineshaft in which all three men were killed during the Castle Gate Mine Explosion on March 8, 1924.

We’ll also be visiting the Western Mining and Railroad Museum to view pictures of the town and the people from back then, and chat with the curators there.

I’ll be posting here and on Facebook, live, during the trip so if you’re as interested in genealogy as I am, follow along! I think you’ll find it fascinating.

Who do I think I am?

A genealogy FANATIC, that’s who!

I’ve been into ancestry research for many years, long before the TV show Who Do You Think You Are? began airing. It has since become one of my favorite programs. How about you? Isn’t it a great show?

When I first signed up with Ancestry.com in 2008, I knew very little about my grandparents, and nothing about anyone beyond them in my family tree. After extensive digging (and some mild obsessing) my first big success came when I discovered a long-lost second-cousin from my paternal grandfather’s side of the family who coincidentally lived a couple of miles from my brother.

I was hooked!

Since then, I have connected with family from all over the world, some of whom happen to look just like me. My dad had 10 first-cousins we never knew about, so I am now enjoying a whole passel of second-cousins.

Next, it was time to dig into my mom’s side of the family.

I wasn’t making much progress until one day I got a message in my Ancestry.com inbox from the husband of my third-cousin (who, up until then, I didn’t know existed), telling me that some of my Scottish ancestors had died in a famous Utah mine explosion.

Over the years, since I first learned of this story, I’ve managed to dig up an impressive amount of information about these people about their lives, and their deaths.

William and Helen, my great-grandparents whose names I didn’t previously know emigrated from Scotland in 1922 with their four kids: Jeannie, Willie (my eventual grandfather), Nellie and Isabella.

Before then, William worked in the coalmines in Scotland, where life was desperately hard. Helen’s brother was a big wig at the coalmine in Castle Gate, Utah and he arranged jobs for his family members. Several of his siblings journeyed across the Pond on ocean liners, with their families, to seek their fortunes.

Only a year later, Helen died of cancer at age 39 leaving Jeannie, who was 19 at the time, to mother her siblings. Six months later William, his brother Peter and their cousin Thomas were all killed in a massive mine explosion that took the lives of 172 men. William and Helen’s kids were now orphaned, strangers in a strange land.

Through my research, I discovered that William and Helen’s kids spent a large sum of money ($2,000 in today’s currency) for their headstone. That tells me that they cared a great deal for their parents — after William was killed, the kids had to fend for themselves. To put themselves in debt like that … well …

I’ve seen this photo of Helen and William’s headstone online, because someone else posted the pic on the FindAGrave website. Next week I’m traveling to Castle Gate to visit their graves for the first time.

It will be my honor to pay my respects to these people, the great-grandparents I never knew — and never would have known, if not for Ancestry.com.


lisa author shotLisa Bonnice is an award-winning, best-selling author. Her current passion-project is a series of metaphysical comedy novels. The first in the series is Be Careful What You Witch For!, a modern-day fairy tale about Lola Garnett, a bored housewife and office drone who wakes up with unexpected psychic abilities, and no instruction manual, and Twink, the reluctant, sarcastic faery assigned to assist and educate her. Its sequel, Patterns in the Chaos, is in the works.

http://www.lisabonnice.com